This has been a strange day, and that might just be an understatement.
Sleeping in until 9:30 was such a nice change to waking up at 7am in order to get up and go to work. I wasn't even woken up by Bella or Milo who usually decided on Saturdays its a good idea to wake up and play at 6 in the morning. Ugh. But thank goodness this didn't happen today. Thank goodness!
After getting up I got to snuggle on the couch with Jake and watch the first of many football games. What a great way to start a Saturday if I do say so myself. But it didn't stay that good all day. Yes, I got to watch the Ugly Truth while Jake went to the gym. And then the last episode of Bones from the first season. And yes, another movie, Julie & Julia before Jake got home. But I was so tired I could hardly stay awake. The hCG shots are making me so tired. So tired its not even funny. Most of the time I'm not fully awake until after 1pm, and some times it's even later.
They are also making me very emotional. This afternoon Jake and I took a shower together like always. It started out normal...getting our hair wet, using shampoo, putting conditioner in. And then I farted...yep, I am admitting that online. Jake thought it was stinky and decided to get out. And then he uses MY towel. The same towel I have been using all week long. Jake said he had no idea who's towel was who's and just grabbed one off the door.
Neither the telling me my fart was smelly or using my towel should have meant anything. But...that's not the case. As soon as I yelled at Jake for using my towel I started to cry. Just a little at first but it got worse. After tuning off the water and getting the other towel I started sobbing. Jake heard me, came back into the bathroom to see if I was ok. I got so upset over absolutely nothing. And even though it was nothing I couldn't stop crying!
While I was sobbing I knew it was stupid but I couldn't stop. Is this how I am going to be when we do actually get pregnant? Or is it going to be worse? Ugh. I wish I was this tired and this emotional for a reason...a good reason. I'm so done with all these shots. I'm so done.
We wont know if this month worked for another week and a 1/2 or so. But I'm so ready for pregnancy. I'm tired of waiting. And not looking forward to another breakdown that is going to happen no matter what.
3 comments:
Oh honey I'm so sorry. If it's any consolation, that's exactly the way I acted a few weeks before I found out I was pregnant. (The crying for no reason thing, not the farting in the shower thing. You're on your own on that one. :) ) Anyway, I was a super-tired, terribly emptional wreck for the first 3 months or so. I hate to tell you that, at least for me, that part didn't go away very fast. But maybe that's a good thing this time? It will happen for you, I know it will. I think of you often and pray for you both. Don't give up hope. :)
Well I can just say I sure HOPE that it won't be that bad when you are pregnant. But I don't think you all will mind TOO much ;) Love you!
Thanks ladies for the support. You two are amazing friends!
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