Is dissapointment on the way again?

After getting shots in the bum...4 times...I don't think it worked! I'm starting to feel cramppy today. And one can only guess what that means. Ugh! I'm not really looking forward to what we will have to do if it doesn't work this month. I think, but am not positive, that our next step will be an injection of dye and an x-ray to see if my tubes are blocked. I have heard that a lot of woman get pregnant right after this because some how it clears things us. Or something. I don't really know.

I am very afraid that we will get the worst news...that my tubes are blocked and will never be able to get pregnant naturally. Not that I call using the hormone hCG and chlomid necessarily "naturally" but its better then the alternative. Not that invitro (sp?) is bad by any means, it just costs a lot of money and there are no guarantees! And if that's the case we will have to do some serious thinking about what we want to do, how much we want to spend, and decide if adoption is a better option for us right now.

So yes, there is a lot running through my mind right now. And all I really want to be doing is sitting on the end of the dock, in my swimsuit, with a glass of ice cold water...In Everwell Bay Lake Coeur d'Alene!

On another note: Jake and I both had blood drawn this week. Dr. Branigan wants to run some test to make sure there is nothing that could be causing us not to get pregnant, even though these tests were done about this time last year. But anyway. Tuesday I go in, give the the sheet and my insurance card, and walk back with the lady to the room. I tell her I'm not really excited about this and she tells me not to worry. And THEN she just stabs the needle into my arm!!! No warning, no nothing. I get back to work, in pain mind you, only to discover I have a bump stating in my elbow pit....you know the part where they draw blood? And the bump keeps getting bigger!!! Needles to say the next day I am BLACK AND BLUE. And still am to this day. I did get a phone call from the office of the scary blood drawing nurse saying they need another vile of blood. I go back on my lunch and am very happy to see a different nurse...phew! I pull up my sleeve and ask if this is normal. Her response is "Oh my gosh! What happened?" I tell her the whole story. She apologizes and tells me to keep pressure on it. Ugh! I hate getting my blood drawn. Atleast there was no bump or bruses this time, thank goodness!

So here is to another day in the sun...and the hopes that the cramps GO AWAY!!!